Kozwell Online

The wedding scene is starting to loose it's place in the sophisticated settings. Straight people are fighting and crying over the "Holy" and "sanctimonious" ceremonies and the previous priest issues.



Straight people say that gay couples can't get married, because god says that marriage is between a man and a woman. Now is this "battle" a just and righteous war against the evils bearing down among the peoples of the world? Or is it just a popular topic that bigots and hate mongers are using to remain in the spot light?



Isn't there a belief instilled into church going parishioners to respect the sacred and holy ground of a church?

There seems to be a massive rise of choreographed "surprise" dances and routines at weddings over the last 2 years. Now a majority of them take place during the reception after the wedding, but lately the "surprise dances are getting more daring and entertaining, but are now being held inside the church.



Where are the gospel fighters? The Holy book toting and hate mongering individuals cursing down these actions? Could it be possible that they are entertained and enjoyed the break out discos?



Maybe, just maybe they decided there is a fine line of "disrespecting" the sanctity of the church, that is acceptable. My opinion is that if same sex or different sex want to be married and suffer the wrath of the "ball and chain"... so be it.

Meet Erin Andrews, 31, from Lewiston, Maine. You may have seen her on ESPN as a sideline reporter or even covering the Tampa Bay Lightning on the Sunshine Network. She has been working with ESPN since 2004 and is/was scheduled to return to sportscasting duties in September.

Andrews has become an Internet sensation due to her vast knowledge of sports and a smoking hot body. She is the two time "America's Sexiest Sportscaster" by Playboy Magazine in 2007 and 2008. Unfortunately for Andrews, her body has now gotten some unwanted attention.

July 16th 2009, a grainy 4 minute and 59 second video appeared online of a blond woman naked doing her hair and around a hotel room. The video looks to be shot from a hole in the wall and she doesn't seem to be aware the camera is recording. Rumors started buzzing around the interwebz that it was Erin Andrews, thus making the video so popular it was the number 2 search on google.

Popular sites like TMZ.com has reported that the video is being shopped around. Andrew's issued a statement through her attorney verifying that she is the woman in the video and it was made without her consent. Digging continues around the Internet and has determined that the video has been online as early as February of 2009.

Marshall Grossman, Andrew's attorney, said, "She was the victim of a crime and is taking action to protect herself and help ensure that others are not similarly violated in the future. Although the perpetrator or perpetrators of this criminal act have not yet been identified, when they are identified she intends to bring both civil and criminal charges against them and against anyone who has published the material. We request respect of Erin's privacy at this time, while she and her representatives are working with the authorities."

The Part that seems to be missed by the other writers is that the video would seem to be quite longer, since there are several jumpcuts made to the video. It will be hard for them to remove the video from the Internet, since its now a hot topic and its a great way for someone to upload a virus to a curious bystander.


Links:
Erin Andrews
Andrew's Statement
Sexiest Sportscaster 2008

There comes a time when everyone has a bad day at work. The dogs barked all night, the wife is leaving you, you got tossed out of the home for cheating, or your just a complete ass and decided today's going to be the day I can't take crap from anyone.

Meet the galactic ass hat by the name of Officer Robert McFarland of Lincoln Park, Michigan. Now McFarland isn't a rookie on the force, but a veteran for over 20 years. After 20 years of police service, you would think that he has dealt with many erroneous situations and able to tell the difference between a real emergency and a waste of time.

Sgt. McFarland was handling the 9-1-1 calls for Lincoln Park, Michigan & had to know that all the calls record the moment the phone rings. Unfortunately for Adrainne Ledesma, 17, she needed help and got this wondertard on the phone.

Ledesma's father was just on the recovery track from brain surgery and started to suffer a seizure. She did what most normal people would have done and called for help. She dialed 9-1-1 and the phone rang, but there wasn't an answer. So she dialed the number again and it was the fourth ring when the phone was answered by Officer McFarland and he heard he saying, "What the fuck."

She goes on to tell the officer that she needs and ambulance and provides the address, but McFarland decides to ignore the request and decides to admonish her for swearing. Which of course makes the emergency situation so much better. She repeats the requests with the profanity and McFarland decides to hang up the phone.

WTF?! A trained officer that is collecting his salary off of the tax paying people just refused emergency service to a Lincoln Park citizen. Maybe it was a dropped call from a cell phone or he was going to send the dispatch since she gave the address....

Not a chance for this role model police officer. Ledesma calls back and she gets McFarland...again. She asks him if he is going to send the ambulance and his reply was, "Are you going to swear again, you stupid ass?" Then he goes on to tell her she is not going to get an ambulance and hangs up again.

McFarland is definitely going for the douche bag of the year, but this is just round two in this five round championship performance. He continues to provide an insurmountable amount of evidence that he is the crown wearing super douche.

The third call went even better than the first two, because she asked for his name because she was going to sue him, his reply "Good," and he (to stay on par so far) decided to hang up again on her. He wasted over 6 minutes before calling the rescue squad. Now the calls are recorded, even the call to the rescue squad where he lied to them about the situation.

"Sgt. McFarland: I kept getting a 911 call…from this filthy-mouth girl that wanted a rescue…I never found out what it was and I was never able to transfer it over to you."

Ledesma decided to leave her older brother to take care of her father, as she went a few blocks from the house to file a complaint against McFarland. Now to keep this train wreck rolling along, she wasn't greeted with an apology or even any assistance. Nope, she was greeted with handcuffs and fictitious charges of "disorderly conduct" and "abusing 9-1-1."

So did the respectful 20 year veteran take responsibility for his actions? Not even close. Leave it to the Chief of Police of Lincoln Park to make everything better and rectify the mistake. Meet Tom Karnes, who admitted, "my guy screwed up on this" and that it was "out of character" for McFarland.

So Karnes is going to rectify the whole thing and take care of McFarland with a punishment fitting for the officer's childish conduct, falsify information, and neglecting the well-being of another citizen... McFarland got a two weeks suspension without pay and had to take "additional" training.

After 20 years and he lied like that on tape, just makes you think how many other times has he falsely written reports or arrested someone? Also what a good feeling it must be for the citizens of Lincoln Park, knowing that this ass hat is going to be on the other end of the phone "providing help."

The police chief said that it wasn't "Their Finest Hour," which is the biggest understatement of the year. That saying is for a person who goes to a prom and falls down in front of the entire room. Not for the potential chance of purposely delaying emergency service and having someone die, that just doesn't fit. The man should be fired from the job and not given any kind of severance package.



Links: 9-1-1 is a Joke in Your Town

Duck...It's Jizz
Welcome to California, the home of Disneyland, Knottsberry Farm, and L.A. Erotica Adult Expo. It's about time that 3d starts to go main stream and typically porn has that effect on technology.

Pure Play Media was pushing Tommy Gunn's Cummin' At You Interactive 3D at AEE, but then went silent. Technology seemed to be the hold up on the March release date.

Rich Arnold, CEO of Pure Play said in a press release, "We want to present the film in the best way possible and know that viewing resolution and the overall experience is key, so we've kept in time with the release of coordinating technology for this masterpiece. This film utilizes the latest in stereoscopic technology making it possible to photograph first-person point-of-view in 3D. Recent developments in consumer electronics will allow the next generation of TVs to have three-dimensional technology built into them so that the viewer does not have to alter their personal style by wearing 3D glasses. The DVD will be encoded to work with these high-end 3D home theatre systems, but it will also work with a standard TV, projection, LCD or Plasma screens with the included 3D glasses."

If the movie sells well, it will spawn more companies to take the risk. 3D advancement will help the POV series and could break off a "choose your own adventure" style that Pure Play has started to make.


Old And Racist...Just A Little.
Meet Marion Mayor Robert Butler, who decided to speak before thinking on Gitmo detainees. He said that the town's medium security prison could be retrofitted to host the unwanted prisoners.

A local news station asked the mayor if he was worried if the prisoners escaped from jail or started living in city and the mayor didn't disappoint.

He went ahead and said, "I cannot imagine that they would care to stay here. We don’t have any camels and there isn’t any sand. So, I’m sure that if they were released they wouldn’t be coming here to this community. They’d be going some place else."

Luckily no one from his staff stopped him and he continued with, "We’ve got our American thugs there. Let’s put the terrorist thugs there. Our American thugs are going to take care of them and so we go from there."


I Called Shotgun First!
The ice cold mountains in Golden, Colorado is home to the Coors Brewing Company. They announced an innovative design change to their Coors Light cans that will make it easier for "shot gunning."

With a tighter economy and gaggles of high school and college parties, this new design is to grab extra sales. It will also save many "party fouls," from occurring on a regular basis as wasted beer gets sprayed on the partier puncturing the beer can.

Coors Brewing Company CEO Peter Swinburn said, "While our current wide-mouth vented can does allow the beer leave the can more quickly and create a smooth, refreshing pour, it doesn’t seem to satisfy the customer that prefers to have the beer shot down his throat. That’s why we’ve created this new can. When used in cooperation with the traditional tab located at the top of the can, the shotgunnable can will completely empty its contents in a matter of seconds."


Cheerleader Bandit
Our final stop on this go round is in Marietta, Georgia. Meet Chelsea Steele, 17, a cheerleader from Sprayberry High School.

Steele, was arrested last Friday for stealing $187 from a wheelchair bound boy who was selling T-Shirts for a charity. Joseph Green was selling t-shirts and hats for a charity at a community pool house.

Steele was on the Sprayberry Varsity cheer leading squad, but many signs of her are disappearing from the school's site. She now faces felony robbery and underage alcohol possession. Cobb County Sheriff's office is looking into potential accomplices, since she was seen leaving the area with a friend in a Ford Taurus.

Random Photo of the Day: Hayden Panettiere Licking a Friend's Boob












Links 3D Porn Mayor's Should Think Frats Rejoice She Cheers You Up And Cleans You Out

Welcome to Provincetown, Louisiana. I know you are wondering why we stopped in this little city of the United States. Well thanks to Wonder-Tard Christopher McEnaney, 18, decided to top all the list of people arrested in the districts 14 arrest night.

McEnaney decided that it was a smart idea to punch Fred with cops nearby. Actually, Fred is the horse that a police officer was riding at the time when McEnaney struck it in Fred's flank. The horse not surprisingly wasn't injured and wonder-tard was arrested.

McEnaney was charged with assault on a police horse and resisting arrest. McEnaney is scheduled to be arraigned in Orleans District Court tomorrow.


Shut Her Up With A Slice of Pizza
As the stories from Iowa trickle across the news wires, we decided to go back there again after yesterday's bare assed story.

Des Moines, Iowa the scene which is now the home of probably the first case of assault with Digiorno. The perpitard Ron Reliford, 36, was upset with Deneen Kilby, 42, then decided to act on that aggression. When police arrived on the scene Reliford was sitting in a car outside of their apartment.

Kilby had redness around her neck and carpet burn on one knee according to police. She managed to escape the attack and called the police from apartment managers phone.

Reliford then told police, "It only takes two minutes to choke a bitch."
He dug his hole deeper, when police revealed, "Reliford said he used some pizza to smash into her face."

He is being held without bond in the Polk County Jail and was charged with domestic assault causing injury.


Stick It In Your Tail Pipe!
Welcome to the great state of Indiana, where a Lawrence Township school board member has been terminated as a reserve police officer.

Meet Adam Goldstein, 39, an unpaid officer in training with the Fortville reserve police officer was driving in a squad car, wearing his full dress uniform, and drunk at the time. He was charged with public intoxication at the Geist Marina on Sunday morning, which was later changed to drunk driving.

Goldstein and the Mrs. Goldstein were out boating at a local reservoir and was cited by the Indiana Department of Natural Resources for failing to have working navigational lights. Apparently, Judge Dread (Goldstein) decided to go home, put on his uniform and gun, then drive to the Fortville Police station to pick up a squad car. Amazingly no one was at the station at this time.

Goldstein then proceeds to drive back to the marina and confront the officer who gave him a citation. Of course Goldstein got out of hand and was arrested, but Goldstein failed a breathalyzer so he was charged with drunk driving.


Random Photo of the Day:

Disney should have sent Tigger to rehab before he pulled an Amy Winehouse.

Links:
Mr. Ed's Pissed!
Return To Iowa
Well F You Buddy!

Bare Assed Busted
Welcome to Iowa, where posting pictures of yourself on Myspace and Facebook, just may lead you to the unemployment line. Abigail Keller, 27, an Altoona reserve police officer was just another in a string of people fired for "questionable" material posted online.

Keller resigned from her position in February after a local business man gave another police officer print outs from her MySpace page. She was in her fifth month of service for the Altoona

Police Chief John Gray said the photograph's on Keller's page depicted her in a bar surround by male and female patrons. He said, "In one photograph, she is displaying her naked buttocks or mooning the person who is taking the picture. In another, she is performing simulated sex acts on both males and females."

Administrative Law Judge Debra L. Wise asked Keller whether she had posted such a photo to her site during a hearing for her unemployment benefits. Keller said that she didn't post a photo of her with her "buttocks" exposed, but pictures of her "making kissy faces."

Gray of course disputed the claim of the "naked buttocks" photo's, because he happens to have a copy of the photo. Gray actually said, "You're pulling your pants down. Your naked buttocks are showing."

Keller said that the pictures were posted back in 2005, months before she was a volunteer officer and she thought the site was restricted. Gray was concerned due to other photographs with Keller in Police uniform and that these other photos would be linked to the Altoona

Judge Wise wrote in her ruling of the unemployment benefits, "In this technology age, she used poor judgment when she posted these pictures in albums on her social-network pages and naively believed no one but close personal friends could access these pictures." department after spending three years as a volunteer officer, when the photos surfaced. department.


Overdue Library Book... Off To Jail
Killeen, Texas is the home of fugitive Victoria Rogers, 21. She has been wanted by the authorities since January 2009 and a warrant for her arrest has been issued.

She says that she wishes she could change the past, but out of fear of being hauled in on the outstanding warrant, she refuses to drive or apply for a job. If she only had returned that darn local library book to the Killeen Public Library, there wouldn't be an issue.

Rogers said, "I apologized and said I didn't mean to. I was floored, I couldn't believe a warrant for a library book."

Her warrant was issued as a class C misdemeanor. She say that she offered to pay for the book, but the city says it's too late. The library has records of multiple messages being mailed out and then turned the case over to the city. Her penalty for one over due book... A date in court and a $340 fine. That's one expensive ass book!


In The Navy!
Welcome to the land down under, Australia. Home of awesome spots like the Sydney Opera House and The Great Barrier Reef, is now how to some sailor scandal.

The Defence Department is investigating claims of Australian sailors engaging in a money for sex competition. Local news station Channel Seven News aired claims that sailors from the HMAS

The sailors kept records in a book they called, "The Ledger." They assigned a cash value on each of the individual female crew members. They even went as far as too step up the game by making the location where the sex took place as part of the game. Pool Tables and lesbians weren't off limits, they were encouraged.

"The matter concerning sailors who were returned to Australia from HMAS Success in May 2009 remains under investigation, so the veracity of any allegations has yet to be confirmed," Defence said in a statement to the Seven Network.

"The individuals were removed from the ship after an equity and diversity health check, which led to a formal inquiry being initiated. During the equity and diversity health check a number of concerns were raised by female crew members. These concerns are now subject to formal inquiry." Success ran a contest of who could sleep with the most female crew members.

Random Photo: Name The School This... Kids Will Attend.










Links: Police Woman? Arrest Her! Sex Games: Navy